• why did the belgium guy run out of gas?
    cuz he wanted to see how far his car would go on empty
  • u know why the belgian guy ran out of gas ... he knew he had a american chicky next to him that he could make pushing the car to the next Gas Station around 170 Miles further, so he could relax and enjoy the view of the area without really having to
  • (A)ccepts you as you are
    (B)elieves in "you"
    (c)alls you just to say "HI"
    (D)oesn't give up on you
    (E)nvisions the whole of you (even the unfinished parts)
    (F)orgives your mistakes
    (G)ives unconditionally
    (H)elps you
    (I)nvites you over
  • As increasing numbers of people are herded into managed care programs,
    they find administrators and green eye-shade types shaping many of the
    treatment decisions that used to be made by a primary care physician.
    At a recent meeting of Western s
  • A science-minded soul, hoping to double his production, flew to
    Scotland, had himself cloned, and brought back his second self
    only to learn that the sorry sequel would utter nothing but vile

    Fearing ruin, the original lured his Lasc
  • An ANAGRAM, as we all know, is a word or phrase made by
    transposing or rearranging the letters of another word or phrase.
    The following examples are quite astounding!

    Dormitory = Dirty Room
    Evangelist = Evil's Agent
    Desperation = A Rope Ends
  • 151. "Man like baby - want to suck tit all day."
    150. "Man who screw blender no longer man."
    149. "Some Men like guns - shoot blanks."
    148. "Men who put cream in tart not always bakers."
    147. "Man who walk in middle of road get hit by bus."
  • If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
    A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
    Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
    For every action there is an equal and opposite crit
  • A man was sitting at a bar enjoying an after-work cocktail when an
    exceptionally gorgeous & sexy young woman entered. She was so striking
    that the man could not take his eyes away from her. The young woman
    noticed his overly-attentive stare &
  • If I had my life to live over,

    I'd dare to make more mistakes next time.
    I'd relax. I'd would limber up.
    I would be sillier than I have been this trip.
    I would take fewer things seriously.
    I would take
  • Imagine there is a bank that credits your account each morning with
    $86,400. It carries over no balance from day to day. Every evening it
    deletes whatever part of the balance you failed to use during the day.

    What would you do?
    Draw out every c
  • 1 The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.
    2 If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
    3 Money can't buy happiness, but it sure buys a better class of misery.
    4 It has recently been discovered that re
  • >* If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
    > * For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.
    > * Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
    > * Corduroy pillows: They're making headlines!

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