An assignment actually turned in by two English st

Rebecca <last name deleted> and Gary <last name deleted>
> English
> 44A
> Creative
> Writing
> Prof
> Miller
>
> ------------------------------------------------------------------------
> In-class Assignment
> for Wednesday
> Today we will experiment with a new form called the tandem story. The
> process is simple. Each person will pair off with the person sitting to
his
> or her immediate right. One of you will then write the first paragraph of
a
> short story. The partner will read the first paragraph and then add
another
> paragraph to the story. The first person will then add a third paragraph,
> and so on back and forth. Remember to reread what has been written each
> time in order to keep the story coherent. The story is over when both
agree
> a conclusion has been reached.
>
> ------------------------------------------------------------------------
> - the resulting untitled story -
>
>
> ------------------------------------------------------------------------
> At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea she wanted. The
> camomile, which used to be her favorite for lazy evenings at home, now
> reminded her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier times, that he
> liked camomile. But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her mind off
> Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating, and if she thought about him too
> much her asthma started acting up again. So camomile was out of the question.
>
> Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of the attack squadron now
> in orbit over Skylon 4, had more important things to think about than the
> neuroses of an air-headed bimbo named Laurie with whom he had spent one
> sweaty night over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he said into
> his transgalactic communicator. "Polar orbit established. No sign of
> resistance so far ..." But before he could sign off a bluish particle beam
> flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through his ship's cargo bay. The
> jolt from the direct hit sent him flying out of his seat and across the
> cockpit.
>
> He bumped his head and died almost immediately, but not before he felt one
> last pang of regret for psychically brutalizing the one woman who had ever
> had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth stopped its pointless
> hostilities towards the peaceful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law
> Permanently Abolishing War and Space Travel." Laurie read in her newspaper
> one morning. The news simultaneously excited her and bored her. She stared
> out the window, dreaming of her youth ... when the days had passed
> unhurriedly and carefree, with no newspapers to read, no television to
> distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at all the beautiful things
> around her. "Why must one lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she
> pondered wistfully.
>
> Little did she know, but she has less than 10 seconds to live. Thousands
> of miles above the city, the Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of
> its lithium fusion missiles. The dim-witted wimpy peaceniks who pushed the
> Unilateral Aerospace Disarmament Treaty through Congress had left Earth a
> defenseless target for the hostile alien empires who were determined to
> destroy the human race. Within two hours after the passage of the treaty
> the Anu'udrian ships were on course for Earth, carrying enough firepower to
> pulverize the entire planet. With no one to stop them they swiftly
> initiated their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile entered the
> atmosphere unimpeded. The President, in his top-secret mobile submarine
> headquarters on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the
> inconceivably massive explosion which vaporized Laurie and 85 million other
> Americans. The President slammed his fist on the conference table. "We
> can't allow this! I'm going to veto that treaty! Let's blow'em out of the
> sky!"
>
> This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of literature. My
> writing partner is a violent, chauvinistic, semi-literate adolescent.
>
> Yeah? Well, you're a self-centered tedious neurotic whose attempts at
> writing are the literary equivalent of Valium.
>
> You total asshole.
>
> Stupid bitch.
>

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