Australia

  • What do Michael Jackson and a Big Mac have in common?
    They're both 44 year old meat between 10 year old buns!
  • An Aussie journalist was in New Zealand doing stories where he saw a Kiwi farmer doing unnatural things with a sheep. He approached the Kiwi and firstly asked, "What sort of sheep is that?" He scribbled down the farmer's reply - "a Merino". The next
  • A KIWI BLOKE WAS ON EARTH DOING THE HAKA.....


    Meanwhile somewhere in space Aliens were watching this unusual dance.
    KAMATE KAMATE KA-ORA KA-ORA......

    The Aliens were very interested in what must be going through his mind right at this moment
  • There were 3 aussies and one New zealander in a bar. The aussies decide that it would be funny to piss the new zealander off."Ok, ok."Said the first one, "I know how to do it." He goes up to the NZer and says "Your Johana Lomu's a gay prick." The guy
  • A guy pulls up to a hotdog stand and says ill have 60 hotdogs thanks the attendant asks why so many? the man 1 for me and 59 for the aussies in the back. again the attendant says how did u fit 59 aussies in the back the man says its easy once you squ
  • What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with an elephant? Bloody big holes all over australia.
  • What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep?

    Wooly Jumpers!!
  • Three Kiwis and three Aussies are traveling by train to a conference.
    At the station, the three Aussies each buy tickets and watch as the
    three
    Kiwis buy only a single ticket.

    "How are three people going to travel on only one ticket?"
  • The Pope was touring Australia & took out a couple of days from
    his itinerary to visit the northern tropics and the outback. Deep
    into his visit, his 4WD Popemobile was driving alongside a river, when he
    heard some splashing up ahead.

    As h
  • Q: What's the difference between Pauline Hanson and a bucket of sludge?
    A: The bucket.

    Q: Why is Pauline Hanson like the commentator at Rosehill?
    A: They both start shouting when they see a new race.

    Q: Why did Pauline Hanson choke on her y
  • One Friday afternoon Little Johnny is in class and the teacher says:
    "Ok class, if you can answer one of these questions, you can go home early and have a day off on Monday"
    "Q1. Who discovered Australia and in what year?"
    L
  • We need to show them that we care..... ..... ..
    It's just not right. Thousands of stevedores in our very own country are
    living at or just below the six figure salary line. And if that wasn't bad
    enough, many of them may go several weeks or mon
 

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